


The Flashdrive

by MagicPencil2



Series: V.I.L.E. Shenanigans [1]
Category: Carmen Sandiego (Cartoon 2019)
Genre: "home" videos, Baby Black Sheep, Gen, Inside jokes, VILE family, all the relationship stuff is minor, and more crack, and more fics in general, curse words, dadowsan, i had fun with this, i wish i could draw this but i can't so here's this crack, i wish this fandom had more fluff, more insinuated relationships rather than explicit, poor confused Bellum, slight crack, who gave saira heelies?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-05
Updated: 2020-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-01 04:01:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,818
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23018971
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MagicPencil2/pseuds/MagicPencil2
Summary: Of course, Shadowsan never went anywhere unprepared. He had packed a few things in a small bag when he left VILE, including some items that spark Team Red's interest.This is NOT going to end well.
Relationships: Dr. Saira Bellum/Countess Cleo (Carmen Sandiego), Shadowsan/Maelstrom
Series: V.I.L.E. Shenanigans [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1679407
Comments: 9
Kudos: 236





	The Flashdrive

**Author's Note:**

> Everything in bold italics is the video, everything in regular font is real-time

The black bag jingled slightly as Shadowsan dropped it on the coach. 

"What's that Shadowsan?"

asked Carmen, looking up from her laptop.

"The bag I took with me when I left VILE. You idn't think I'd leave with nothing, did you?"

He fished a plain green flashdrive out from the bag's depths, moving the bag away as he started to open up his computer.

"A flashdrive? From VILE?"

Carmen seemed suspicious, causing Zack and Ivy to look over too.

"My personal files."

"...like?"

"Notes, pictures from my VILE phone, a few videos--"

"Videos? Of what?"

Zack prompted, eyeing the device. Shadowsan rolled his eyes.

"Just events that happened on VILE island we caught on film that I saved."

"SHOW US!"

shouted Ivy, Zack nodding along. Shadowsan sighed, but looked to Carmen. She closed her laptop, seeming just as interested.

"Can you show us a video?"

Shadowsan grumbled, muttering a few things under his breath, but all the same plugged the tiny device into the USB slot.

The drive secured itself in the laptop with a tiny click, quickly loading up an _"Enter Passcode"_ screen. Shadowsan tapped a few keys, and the screen switched to a list of options.

"Heya sensi, what's your password?"

joked Zack, not expecting an answer. Sure enough, Shadowsan grumbled and glared at the redhead.

"It is nothing you would know."

"Would I be able to guess it?"

Carmen questioned.

"Doubtful."

"Can I get hint?"

"No."

"Please?"

"Fine. My passcode is Professor Maelstrom's middle name and age, no spaces."

Ivy watched Carmen's face as she tried to recall the trivia about one of her former guardians while Zack rushed off to make popcorn. The frustration and confusion painted on her features made it clear she had no idea. The lady in red grabbed a notepad off the coffee table and started frantically scribbling, trying to work out Shadowsan's password.

Shadowsan selected a video, full screening it.

"This one will suffice."

Zack jumped onto the coach just as the ninja hit play, jostling the two girls. Carmen hissed lowly at the disturbance, but said nothing. Ivy shoved her hand in the bowl, grabbing some popcorn before her brother could consume it all

_**The video started with a slightly fuzzy image of the Faculty's meeting room, slowly focusing into a clear scene. The video was clearly taken from the surveillance system in VILE island, for at the bottom left of the screen, a light green timestamp read 7/14/1999.** _

"Wait, how long ago was this video?"

Zack managed to get out through a mouthful of food.

"Check with your mouth closed bro!"

Ivy chided, but looked to Shadowsan all the same.

"This video is from 20 years ago, of a VILE Faculty meeting when Carmen, then Black Sheep, was a few months old."

"Oooooooo yeah! A baby Carm video!"

Zack cheered. Shadowsan ignored him and continued the clip.

_**T** **he camera focused in on the two people standing in front of the long table. A younger Shadowsan was listening to a younger Dr. Bellum ranting about something. The audio kicked in, allowing the viewers to hear the scientist's furious rant.** _

_**"She CONFISCATED my HEELY WHEELS!"** _

Zack burst out laughing, Ivy covering his mouth with her hand so she could hear.

**" _I'm absolutly LIVID! I had to WALK down the hallway like a COMMON_ _PEASANT! "_**

Zack's laughter intensified at the awkward look on the other Shadowsan's face as he tried to figure out what to say.

"I was still new to the Faculty at the time."

Shadowsan commented, pointedly ignoring Zack.

_**"I feel like Lucifer stripped of his WINGS!"** _

_**"Uh...my condolences?"** _

Ivy started snickering, but stopped under the ninja's glare.

_**"Nah, don't be sorry, Maelstrom's stealing the back for me."** _

_"... **why**?"_

_**"He owes me for the 'mariachi band' incident."** _

Carmen glanced up just in time to see the younger Shadowsan's confusion, causing her to giggle.

_**A younger Professor Maelstrom dropped from an open vent grate, looking slightly ruffled but unharmed. He handed the small objects to Dr. Bellum as Shadowsan licked a finger and smoothed down the Norwegian's hair.** _

Carmen glanced over at the present day ninja, eyes narrow as she tried to puzzle out the relationship between the two men.

_**"Got them Saira!"** _

_**Maelstrom sounded like he had been running, as he was panting slightly. Dr. Bellum threw herself around him in a tight hug.** _

_**"Thanks Gunnar! You're the best!"** _

_**"Consider the Mariachi Band incident debt paid then."** _

_**"Are either of you going to explain the Mariachi Band incident?"** _

_**A new voice asked. The younger Coach Brunt had entered the scene. The two guilty teachers looked at each other for a moment, then said in unison** _

_**"Nope."** _

_**Brunt rolled her eyes, shifting the little girl in her arms as Saira reinstalled the wheelies into her heelies.** _

"Aww! You were so cute Red."

Player's voice cut in from above. The siblings nodded in agreement.

"Adorable Carm."

_**Dropping the Baby Black Sheep into her chair at the table, Brunt turned to Shadowsan as if to ask him a question. She never got a chance to, as the door once again opened, letting a younger Countess Cleo in. The Egyptian noticed Black Sheep immediately.** _

_**"Why is she here?"** _

_**"Her nanny's sick, last minute solution."** _

_**Cleo rolled her eyes, but was distracted by Dr. Bellum heelying around the room and talking to a concerned Maelstrom.** _

_**"Wait, didn't I confiscate those?"** _

_**On screen, Saira froze.** _

_**"DR. SAIRA BELLUM HOW DID YOU GET THOSE BACK-"** _

_**"AH CRUMPETS!"** _

_**Dr. Bellum cursed before booking it out of the room, closely followed by a fuming Countess.** _

"Did...did she just use Crumpets as a cuss word?"

Muttered Ivy. Player was cackling like a madman.

"Oh my god! This is the best!"

_**From outside the frame of the video, you can hear Cleo yelling.** _

_**"You are a VILE member, living under VILE's roof! You have to obey VILE's rules!"** _

"Okay boomer.."

Whispered Player, causing Zack and Ivy to laugh harder.

_**"Actually Cleo, I'm on an open-top balcony, which is under God's roof! And God wants me to HEELIE AWAY FROM YOUR CRAP!"** _

Zack accidentally sprayed popcorn on himself laughing. Carmen started laughing too, prompting the siblings to laugh harder.

_**"...but she's an atheist??"** _

_**mused Maelstrom. Brunt's laughter was masked by Saira singing "We didn't start the fire" EXTREMELY off-key over Cleo's furious yelling. Shadowsan facepalmed.** _

The current day Shadowsan also face-palmed, which was, for some reason, hilarious to Carmen, who buried her face in her hands to muffle her giggles.

_**Maelstrom smiled softly and Brunt chuckled, both taking their seat at the Faculty table. The younger Shadowsan followed suit. Black Sheep started wandering around the room, fining interest in the legs of the table. A few moments later, Dr. Bellum rushes in, out of breath. She plops down in her chair, breathing hard and cackling.** _

_**"I shoved Cleo into the ocean!"** _

_**Brunt snorted while Maelstrom looked impressed.** _

_**"She's gonna kill ya."** _

_**"Probably."** _

_**"Ya know, if you ran more laps, you wouldn't be so beat by a quick chase. You should work out more."** _

_**"And YOU should retake 4th grade science. This time, you might actually pass!"** _

Zack and Ivy both "Oooooh"ed, and Player shouted

"Oooo BURN!"

_**The younger Maelstrom looked amused, taking a drink of his coffee.** _

"And THAT'S the TEA sis."

murmured Carmen to Player's delight

_**Countess Cleo marched back into the frame, dripping wet and full of rage. Everyone laughed. Dr. Bellum called out** _

_**"Have a nice swim Countess?"** _

"You little shit.."

muttered Shadowsan, renewing the laughter and nearly making Zack fall off the couch.

"Are you sure these guys are dangerous?"

Ivy snorted

_**"Let's just get on with it."** _

_**Countess Cleo snapped, angrily sitting down in her chair. The meeting continues for a few minutes, with Black Sheep eventually plopping down on the floor in front of the table to watch the screen. Maelstrom is in the middle of suggesting an alternative to a certain mission when Black Sheep starts muttering.** _

Zack leaned closer, trying to hear what she was saying, but to no avail.

"Carmen, you will want too see this part."

said Shadowsan, making her sigh and drop the notepad.

_**"What's up Lambkins?"** _

_**Coach Brunt asks. Black Sheep keeps muttering, louder but still unclear.** _

_**"Black Sheep, you need to speak up to be heard."** _

_**Countess Cleo sighs. Black Sheep turns to look at the Faculty, takes a deep breath, and yells at the top of her lungs** _

_**"FUCK!"** _

Zack chocked on his popcorn as Ivy nearly started crying she was laughing so hard. A faint 'thud' was heard over the speakers as Player hit the floor cackling. Carmen just stared at the screen in shock.

_**Countess Cleo shot upright, looking extremely shocked. Professer Maelstrom, jostled by the sudden movement and his own shock fell out of his chair. Coach Brunt's laughter seemed to encourage Black Sheep, who giggled and clapped her hands. Dr. Bellum, looking rather confused, said** _

_**"What does fu-"** _

_**but never got to finish before the other members shrieked** _

_**"NO!"** _

Carmen, Ivy, and Zack were holding onto each other for support, laughing so hard tears came to their eyes.

_**Dr. Bellum pouted, slidding down her chair and making her look even shorter.** _

_**"No one ever defines the words that make Cleo mad..."** _

"Does...does she not know what 'fuck' means?"

questioned Ivy over her heavy breathing. Shadowsan closed his eyes.

"Cleo and Maelstrom had a running thing where they refused to define English curse words for Saira, which annoys the hell out of her. Cleo even made her block all the websites that could define them for her."

"How did THAT end?"

"A few years after this video, Saira swindled her way out of her promise to them never to research the words by having students define them when they used them. She treated it like a game, which she won."

"Nice."

Player commented, sounding impressed.

_**On screen, the younger Black Sheep seemed super happy by the chaos she caused, because she kept yelling** _

_**"FUCK!"** _

_**at full volume.** _

_**Maelstrom claps his hands over Dr. Bellum's ears, looking every bit like an offended parent. Cleo was yelling at Brunt that this was her fault, while Brunt just kept saying** _

_**"Momma's SO PROUD!"** _

"Hey guys, sorry to interruptour viewing session, but I just got word of VILE operatives on the move in Miami. You should probably head out to intercept them."

Player's voice was full of regret as he relayed this information, sad they had to pause the video.

"It is fine, the rest of the video is Black Sheep continuing to curse while Cleo attacks Brunt."

said Shadowsan dryly, closing his computer.

"So, what other videos have you got?"

clamored Zack as they prepared to board the private jet.

"Like, footage of Carm bein' a thief? Ooo, or her prankin' her classmates?"

"Yeah, show us more Shadowsan!"

Shadowsan sighed

_This was going to be a long flight._

**Author's Note:**

> Idk when Heelies came out, but idc. It's for comedy purposes

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [They Definitely Have A Group Chat](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23203132) by [So_u_like_pkmn](https://archiveofourown.org/users/So_u_like_pkmn/pseuds/So_u_like_pkmn)
  * [VILE Apparently Have Home Videos](https://archiveofourown.org/works/23225863) by [So_u_like_pkmn](https://archiveofourown.org/users/So_u_like_pkmn/pseuds/So_u_like_pkmn)




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